We reflect on ourself everytime we find peace at the moment. When you are off the routine, you realize what is presently happening to you. You pause, look at things differently and you sigh unconsciously. You are convinced that there is nothing wrong going on in your life. Because what’s there infront of you are the choices you made.
We dive into our thoughts because our world is either too deep or too shallow. There are days we spent our time on the shore, just fine, but eventually we find ourselves drowning and losing our minds over a shallow dive.
“Sometimes everything hits you all at once. You lose a relationship, change jobs, old friends go and new friends come. It’s up one day and down the next. You have it all together on Monday and by Thursday you don’t have a clue. Life is one big wave and all we can do is flow, adapt and transform with it all.”— Sylvester McNutt
realizations - thoughts to write
If there’s one thing I miss the most about my life right now, that would be having only myself to rely on every decisions. The feeling of being able to do what is right and just. The feeling of being happy even you only have yourself to rely on to. The simple things you can do in your life without judgements and opinions from others. The feeling of being able to enjoy your choice of music because that’s who you are and your character. I miss those most especially on this moment.
What could possibly went wrong in a happy relationship? Could it be too much enjoyment and happiness? I don’t know. But there’s one thing I’m sure of right now. I want to go back to where I should be. I want my lonely self but full of content and happiness.
I’m always thankful for the people I have in my life but this time I want selfcare. I want to own every decision I make. I am close to losing myself and I’m scared. I do not want to lie to the people I love. I want to be freed on this misery.
Unknown
(via thoughtkick)
Yes. Self note.
It’s complicated.They say if you want to deal with your stress, you have to simply write it down. Breathe, reflect, and one by one face whatever problems you have. For the past 3 to 4 months I think, my life somehow became so complicated that I almost give up and just wanted to be done with it and do nothing. To escape is the only thing I can think of every time I get stress out. An escape even just for a day so that I won’t think of it or deal with it the whole day. I am ashamed of what I’ve become. I am ashamed to discover this side of me that exist every single time that I can’t manage the situation. My stress has turned me into the worst version of myself. My problems overtook the good person inside me. And now, I’m starting to think that this is the real me. I am losing myself to the person I’ve become. I hope this will be over soon. I want my real self back on track. I should be more than my problems. I just pray for a fresh start.
“Why do people move? What makes them uproot and leave everything they’ve known for a great unknown beyond the horizon? … The answer is the same the world over: people move in the hope of a better life.”— Yann Martel, Life of Pi